So, as I mentioned yesterday, JT and I went and bought makeup the other day. Having the disposable income to enjoy a splurge on makeup is a relatively new experience and it really highlights the socio-economic indicators of makeup shopping.
I’ve enjoyed MAC products for years. But I’ve always gravitated towards the eyeshadows. This is, in part, because eye shadows are little explosions of awesome color. But they are also, arguably, among the cheaper makeup products, especially if you are getting the palette pans ($10.50) instead of the individual pots ($14).
My life has wound its way between classes. My father’s family is comfortable, a bit country club, so I know the rules for those situations. My mother’s family is pure working class. Firemen and mechanics. And I spent way more time with them. I move back and forth with a certain amount of ease because I know what is expected - knowing the rules and having the confidence to fake comfort will carry you a long way - but I have never had the personal funds to procure the right Look. Plus, you know, I’m fat. And that is an entirely different social marker.
Even as an adult, especially when I was teaching, I’ve been stretched, caught in that paycheck to paycheck trap. An eye shadow - or a couple of eye shadows if I was unexpectedly flush - was a welcome indulgence, a bit of reward that made me feel like things weren’t quite so grim (and when I was teaching, things were GRIM).
Now I find myself settling marginally into a more middle class situation (which comes with its own terrors) and other products in which I had no interest hold more appeal. It baffles me, still, how much money people can spend on moisturizers. I’m appalled at the price of my own moisturizer (Bobbi Brown’s Face Base $45)!
And that has more, I think, to do with my previous inability to fathom spending that much on something that wasn’t a necessity than it does with any (nonexistent) inherent disinterest in things like moisturizers. Such items were never even in the realm of justifiable, you know?
Of course, even when I was walking the thin poverty line, there were people with even less cash than me. My $10 makeup indulgence was someone else’s weekly food budget. Makeup gets a lot less important in those situations - and unfortunately people are still judged by that lack of participation in a social ritual.
When I walk into the makeup store now, and I’m able to purchase things that used to be entirely out of my reach, I am participating in that aspect of our culture that values makeup and the way women who wear it present themselves. Hopefully, through shopping with a company that values diversity and then wearing makeup according to my own rules instead of the narrow ones imposed by the beauty standard, I’m helping to undercut those societal expectations that get imposed whether you are a willing participant or not. But, still, to a casual observer, I may very well be just another woman wearing makeup.
This is the aspect of makeup that makes me uncomfortable. It is ALWAYS going to be out of some people’s reach. In that regard, it will always underscore socio-economic differences and be used as a marker for class levels. I don’t feel guilt for being able to purchase things like the beauty powder I brought home the other day. But I do wonder if I’m perpetuating a system I’m trying to oppose.
